Archive for the 'Lighten Up' Category

(Chronologically Listed)

Do you take life too seriously? This is for you.

 Save the whales. Collect the whole set
A day without sunshine is, like, night
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

Posted by rainy on September 15th, 2007 under Lighten Up | Comment now »

EULOGY

After dying in a car crash, three friends go to Heaven for orientation. They are all asked the same question: “When you are in your casket, friends and family are mourning over you, what would you like to hear them say about you?”
The first guy immediately responds, “I would like to hear them say that […]

Posted by rainy on December 4th, 2006 under General Jokes, Lighten Up | Comment now »

Quotes from George Burns

George Burns Quotes
A good sermon should have a good beginning and a good ending, and they should be as close together as possible.
Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
At my age flowers scare me.
Be quick to learn and wise to know.
Bridge is a game that separates the men […]

Posted by rainy on November 14th, 2006 under General Jokes, Senior Jokes, Lighten Up, Jokes about aging | Comment now »

Stressed? Try these stress relievers.

Jam miniature marshmallows up your nose and sneeze them out. See how many you can do at a time.
Use your Mastercard to pay your Visa and vice-versa.
Pop some popcorn without putting the lid on.
When someone says “have a nice day”, tell them you have other plans.
Make a list of things to do that you have […]

Posted by rainy on October 26th, 2006 under The Gene Pool, General Jokes, Lighten Up | Comment now »

Waiting For The Bank Teller

In a long line of people waiting for a bank teller, one guy suddenly started massaging the back of the person in front of him. Surprised, the man in front turned and snarled, “Just what the hell you are doing?”
“Well,” said the guy, “You see, I’m a chiropractor and I could see that you were […]

Posted by rainy on June 25th, 2006 under General Jokes, Lighten Up | Comment now »

The Sunday Drive

Do you enjoy taking a Sunday Drive in the country?
Enjoy!
The Sunday Drive Movie

Posted by rainy on April 8th, 2006 under Don't Mess with..., Lighten Up, Husbands|Wives | 1 Comment »

Thinking…thinking…


Posted by rainy on March 27th, 2006 under Lighten Up | Comment now »

George Carlin’s View on Aging

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we’re kids? If you’re less than 10 years old, you’re so excited about aging that you think in fractions.
“How old are you?” “I’m four and a half!” You’re never thirty-six and a half. You’re […]

Posted by rainy on March 20th, 2006 under Inspirational, Lighten Up, Jokes about aging | Comment now »

Deep Thoughts

Deep Thoughts For Those Who Take Life Way Too Seriously:

Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
A day without sunshine is like…night.
On the other hand, you have different fingers
42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. […]

Posted by rainy on March 4th, 2006 under Lighten Up | Comment now »

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