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Archive for the 'Women' Category
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When I’m an Old Lady
When I’m an old lady,
I’ll live with each kid,
And bring so much happiness…
just as they did.
I want to pay back
all the joy they’ve provided,
Returning each deed.
Oh, they’ll be so excited!
I’ll write on the wall
with reds, whites and blues,
And bounce on the furniture
wearing my shoes.
I’ll drink from the carton
and then leave it out.
I’ll stuff all the [...]
WARNING FOR ALL WOMEN !
This is a heads up to those friends who haven’t experienced it yet, and an explanation to those friends and family who have. Most of you have read the scare-mail about the person whose kidneys were stolen while he was passed out. Well, read on. While the kidney story was an urban legend, this one [...]
Posted by rainy on October 31st, 2006 under Baby Boomers!, General Jokes, Pass it On, Women | Comment now »Strange “Senior” Personal Ads Gleaned from Florida Papers
“Senior” Personal Ads Gleaned from Florida Papers (Who says We Seniors Have No Sense of Humor?)
FOXY LADY: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80’s, slim, 5′4″ (used to be 5′6″), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.
LONG-TERM COMMITMENT: Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband, and am looking for someone to [...]
Grandma’s Letter
Got a letter from Grandma the other day.
She writes: The other day, I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a “Honk if you love Jesus” bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day, because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting; so [...]
Evolution of Man and Woman
The Evolution of Man and Woman
…..
http://walter.no.sapo.pt/humor/2001-06-28/humor-044.gif
Posted by rainy on September 29th, 2006 under General Jokes, Men, Women | Comment now »Shoplifting
An old woman was arrested for shoplifting at a grocery store.
When she appeared before the judge, the judge asked what she had taken.
The lady replied, “A can of peaches.”
The judge then asked why she had done it.
She replied, “I was hungry and forgot to bring any cash to the store.”
The judge asked how many peaches [...]
Who is driving?
Two elderly women were out driving in a large car-both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself “I must be losing it, I could have sworn we [...]
Posted by rainy on July 10th, 2006 under Senior Jokes, Women | 1 Comment »The gunshot
Aging Ruth, was a 93-year-old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband, Gabriel. She decided that she would just kill herself and join him in death.
Thinking that it would be best to get it over with quickly, she took out Gabe’s old Army pistol and made the decision to shoot [...]
When I’m an old lady and live with my kids
(When I’m an old lady and live with my kids)
When I’m an old lady, I’ll live with each kid,
And bring so much happiness…just as they did.
I want to pay back all the joy they’ve provided.
Returning each deed! Oh, they’ll be so excited!
(When I’m an old lady and live with my kids)
I’ll write on the wall [...]
Seniors having babies…
You’ve probably read the stories like I have. Older Women having babies. I think the latest was a 63 year old woman. Lots of discussion going on about that. And of course, someone came up with a good joke about it….
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Seniors having babies…
With all the new technology regarding fertility recently, a 65-year-old
woman was able [...]
